How To Be A Writer
All the things a real writer needs to know and do.
PUNCH SELF DOUBT IN THE DICK!
TEA BAG MARIO VARGAS LLOSA FOR BEING A PUSSY!
COLLECT UNPAID INVOICES WITH THREATS AND VIOLENCE!
BREAK YOUR EDITOR'S SPIRIT LIKE A DRY TWIG!
WRITE LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER!
It's all here. All the things I wish somebody had told me so many years ago.
- Buy Now
The Chronicles of Dave. Vol. 1.
Exclusive to Kindle. Get 'A Soul Full of Guns' and 'A Protocol for Monsters' in one volume for a sweet discount. Because The Dave, he likes it cheap.
- No options in your region
A Protocol for Monsters
The companion volume to Emergence, the story of Dave Hooper's superhero embiggening. When an oil rig drills too deep under the Gulf of Mexico it breaks the capstone separating our world from the UnderRealms - home to monsters, daemons and dark magiks. The nightmares of our long ago come flooding back into the world where they are met by automatic weapons fire, heating seeking missiles (they're hell on dragons, don'tcha know) and one drunken, dissolute son of a bitch called Dave.
But this is not Dave's story. This is the story of the poor bastards who had to put up with him while he saved the world and acted like a jerk.
A Soul Full of Guns
When monsters and dark magicks came back into the world it looked like Dave Hooper, aka 'Super Dave', might be our only hope. Thankfully not. Super Dave is dumpster fire of regret and disappointment for anyone who relies on him.
Colonel Ekaterina Varatchevsky of the Russian GRU, a deep cover agent operating in the US as Karen Warat, a successful New York art dealer, doesn't want to rely on him. And when she is gifted with superpowers curtesy of killing a Threshrend Daemonum which attacks her gallery and eats rather a large number of Manhattan's 1%, she doesn't have to rely on Dave any more.
She has to target him.
This is her story. Not told by Dave. Because you can't trust that guy.
Stalin's Hammer: Rome
The year is 1955, ten years after a battle fleet from 2021 exploded through a wormhole in space—straight into the Battle of Midway. A staggered, war-torn world catches its balance. Uptimers, with their extraordinary technology and strange styles, mingle with the real timers. Universities study the effects on the future. And men like Prince Harry of England find themselves playing pivotal roles in a history that has already happened.
Stalin's Hammer: Cairo
The future vs the past. F22 Raptors vs Zeros. Prince Harry (yes, that Prince Harry) vs Hitler and Stalin. Ten years ago a powerful Allied battle fleet was sucked into a wormhole and thrown back into World War Two. History was blown apart. The Soviet Union now controls half of Europe and supreme dictator Joseph Stalin reaches for a weapon to enslave or destroy the rest of the world. Only Harry can stop him.
- Buy Now
Stalin's Hammer: Paris
- No options in your region
'Monsters,' said Vince Martinelli. 'There are monsters on the rig, Dave.' Dave Hooper has the hangover from hell, a demonic ex-wife and the claws of the tax office sinking into him. So the last thing he needs is an explosion at the off-shore oil rig where he works. But this is no ordinary industrial accident, and despite the news reports, Dave knows that terrorists aren't to blame for the disaster. He knows because he kills one of the things responsible.
"When you drop a monster-killer on the Strip, all bets are off." Holed up in Las Vegas after the tumultuous Battle of New Orleans, Dave is enjoying the VIP perks afforded a champion monster-slayer. He may be a superhero of swag and the toast of the town, but if some fire-breathing dragons have their way, odds are everyone will soon be toast.
New York is on fire, the streets are overrun, and the Demon Horde is feasting. With the world's greatest city in chaos, all eyes are on Dave Hooper, the superhero destined to save mankind.
But hero or not, Dave is just one man and he's short of allies. He soon finds himself relying on Karen Warat: art dealer and Russian deep cover agent. Smart, dangerous and armed with a magic sword, Dave knows not to trust her. He also knows that without her, New York will fall.
Weapons of Choice
The impossible has spawned the unthinkable. A military experiment in the year 2021 has thrust an American-led multinational armada back to 1942, right into the middle of the U.S. naval task force speeding toward Midway Atoll—and what was to be the most spectacular U.S. triumph of the entire war.
The nightmare of the Transition has given way to a world in chaos. The battlelines of World War II are being redrawn in dangerous and unpredictable ways, leaving the Allied forces scrambling for control and the Axis forces with undreamt-of power.